So the wedding planning finally is starting to feel real, we have just over a year to actually make plans and I am getting excited. 

Not again.....

Okay so I have decided that this officially sucks, I went through all that silliness (tests, procedures) last summer to get the ablation, the wondrous cure all for my female problems, but my stupid period came back.  At first I was nervous – “oh no, is this normal” but a quick Internet search revealed that periods stop forever in only 50% of the women who have an ablation – a fact that was not made clear to me last summer when discussing options.  Now I not only have the pleasure of having a monthly period, but now I am nervous – is that stupid ‘thickened lining’ going to come back, am I at risk for cancer, do aliens really exist – okay so I don’t actually worry about that last one, I just wanted to see if you were paying attention. 

On the bright side - I did sign up for short term disability so if I do need to get a hysterectomy next year i will be covered for the time off - Yeah!  Wait I think I am getting ahead of myself, but it does appear that my body was designed for procreation, I simply cannot stop having a period even after electrifying my uterus.  I really do have to write this book one of these days.

one step forward, two steps backs......

So as I have begun writing ( yup - already wrote several pages) I am struck with concern about what I have written.  It feels stilted, artificial and yes....even boring at times.  Ugh!  I have the ideas but I really want to make them come alive off the page, to make the stories magnificent.  I want a story that is so compelling that its too hard to put down.  I think my strategy will be to just get something on paper ( or in this case on computer) and then come back to it to make it better, then give it to someone ( like Kaitlyn) to make it even better. 

Ready, Set, Procrastinate

I'm ready to get writing - but I'm distracting my self by coming up with different ideas to write about.  Right now I have 6 possible manuscript outlines and titles.  I'm not sure if I'm just being creative or if I'm avoiding doing the hard work.  Getting organized seems like half the battle.  I went through all my old notes, I put everything in folders and/or on the computer and I did actually do some writing.  I know I can do it.  It is funny but I seem to prefer writing long hand instead of typing - there is something about actually wrintg longhand that feels more honest or creative.

I did actually write my goals out for 2013 - including writing (at least one manuscript ready by August) losing weight (at least 25 pounds by August) and paying off all the credit cards.  These seems very achievable - as I long as I am disciplined and get to work - so with that, time to go workout.