Why I love being an Aunt

Being an Aunt is such a special relationship – it is all of the fun and none of the work.  

I get to watch my amazing nieces and nephews grow into incredible people that I am really proud to know.

We have special secrets – just between us.  We have inside jokes that we like to laugh about in front of their parents just to bug them.

I get the chance to make fun of my siblings, which gives my nieces and nephews a chance to see their parents in a whole new way.

I get to share their interests and learn more about technology, sports and so many other things that I would not have learned without them.

I get to be a ‘Great Aunt’ (although let’s face it I am already a great aunt)

I have so much fun sharing memories with them, especially corny old pictures of the family and stories about our history.

Unlike their parents, I don’t give advice unless they ask me.  My only job is to encourage them and let them know how much I love them.

Everyone has that one weird uncle, but somehow being the weird Aunt is cool.

And yes, someday they will be the ones to sneak booze into my nursing home. 

Looking forward to Retirement

My husband and I have spent extra time talking about and thinking about our retirement lately.  As we get closer to retirement age, we have spent a great deal of time getting prepared. If you are anything like us, you have a lot of unanswered questions so I wanted to take some time to review some of the big decisions that retirement will bring.

First, and probably most important will be making a retirement budget. Sit down and think about all of the expenses you will have.  It is hard to successfully plan for retirement if you have no idea how much money you will need to live.  It is important to be realistic about your expenses, and be sure to include extras for those items that are hard to plan for, like car and home repairs, gifts and special occasions, etc.

While making your budget, you will have to look closely at any of your retirement income and weigh that against your decision of when to apply for social security. Applying at 62 or 67 will have benefits and drawbacks.  Waiting will increase the amount of your monthly check, but you might have less payout overall.  Women usually earn less than men, so married women will need to look at whether they should apply for ½ of their husbands benefit amount or if the amount they will receive on their own is a larger amount.  

Now is a good time to review all of your previous employment 401K and retirement accounts, and see which ones you can consolidate, which will make things easier to keep track of.  

The next big decision is whether or not to downsize.  We have given a great deal of thought to this topic. Right now we are in a big 2-story 4-bedroom house that is much bigger than we need.  Downsizing not only has the benefit of less house to clean and pay for, but often can result in additional funds that can be put into retirement investment accounts.  Additional benefits of downsizing include lower utility costs, reduced maintenance and upkeep, and for us the prospect of no stairs to deal with as our bones and joints continue to age.  Of course this decision is anything but simple, downsizing also depends on the real estate market at the time and the sentimental value of staying in your current home, not to mention the effort and expense of moving and having to get rid of possessions that will no longer fit into your new smaller home.  There may be some tax implications as well, so you should discuss this with financial professionals to be sure what the right decision is for you. 

Whether you choose to downsize or not, now is the time to begin to declutter.  It is important to let go of some of those possessions you no longer need, this will help you in moving into a new smaller place and your children have less to sort through after you are gone.  

It is exciting to think about retirement, I am looking forward to enjoying time with my husband and hopefully all of our planning will pay off.

Stay Smart to Prevent Fraud

There are lots of scams out there. Almost every week I receive one or more phishing emails telling me I won something or my account at such-and-such bank has been compromised so just ‘click here’ to update my info.  The problem is I usually don’t even have an account at that bank.  It is important to be smart online.   

Recently I came across some good basic tips for being safe and smart to prevent fraud so I thought I would go ahead and share them here. 

·       Never give your social security number for identification purposes, and don't give out personal information unless you are legally required to do so.

·       Treat your debit cards like cash and ensure a PIN number is required to make a purchase. 

·       Check your credit card and bank statements regularly.
(I actually check my bank account daily so I will know right away if something is wrong)

·       Obtain an annual credit report.  There are several banks and credit card companies that will tell you your credit score, but that is not the same as actually looking at your credit report.  A free service to check your credit is creditkarma.com 

·        If you receive hard copy bills or credit card offers, please remember to shred the documents and sign up for electronic copies to have less of a paper trail where possible. I also take the time to shred all those pesky credit card offers I receive in the mail, I don’t want someone digging those out of the trash and trying to open an account in my name.  

·       If you receive an unsolicited call from someone asking to confirm information on your completed tax return or your bank account, DO NOT provide personal information. Hang up and call back using the company’s legitimate phone number, not the one you received by the caller. This will help ensure your information only goes to the legitimate company or service. Please note, the IRS will not call you to verify information on your return. Consider using the White Pages’ reverse phone look-up to confirm the identity of a caller, and ensure it’s not a scam or a hoax.

If you have any good tips for preventing fraud please share them in the comments below.

A No Politics Rule?

Recently I saw a statement in an online group proclaiming a “no politics rule” and while I understand the sentiment behind that statement, I would like to offer a different opinion. 

Instead of a no politics rule, we need to teach our children and many adults how to discuss politics in a civil manner.  People need to learn how to argue without resorting to name calling and defensiveness. We need to teach that having a difference of opinion is not a bad thing, and that we can actually learn from each other if we would just listen more.

The idea that we cannot or should not even discuss something that we might not agree on is not a healthy strategy, and likely this lack of ability to discuss politics in a civil manner has led to the degradation of political discussions that we are having today in our country.  

Now I do realize that many people hold strong opinions one way or the other, but to refuse to even talk to each other only makes the problem worse.  With the use of social media, people scream at total strangers online and hurl wild accusations at each other for holding differing opinions. Sadly this is not new. For as long as the United States has existed, Americans have argued about politics. It has only been recently that these arguments have turned so vicious.  

What is lacking is a basic education in how to argue and while I do realize that every parent reading this thinks their child is already proficient at arguing, there is a right way and a wrong way to argue.  We need to teach people how to use reasoned arguments with evidence that supports their assertions.  We also need to teach the use of language that does not incite, but rather focuses on the specifics of the argument.  Learning how to refute an opinion in a polite way can make all the difference.  

Young George Washington sat and copied by hand 110 rules for Civility and Decent Behavior in Company and Conversation.  You can find these rules online or purchase a copy of this book.  After giggling at a few of the archaic rules about spitting and what the proper attire is in front of company, the majority of these rules are highly applicable to today. Teaching the basic rules of civility and teaching others how to respectfully argue with others might be a big improvement from where we are right now, and wouldn’t that be nice.  

rules for civility

My Ancestry Adventure

I have always had a pretty good idea of my family background I listened to the stories from my mom and dad. I knew my grandparents and great grandparents came from Europe, so when my family decided to go ahead and do the ancestry DNA test I was pretty sure what it would tell me, but what if that wasn’t the whole truth? What if the ideas I held my whole life wasn’t my family history? What if I am not exactly who I think I am? 

Anytime someone asks me, I explain that I am half Irish and the other half Jewish and well that’s not exactly the split - it’s pretty close but my mother is really only half Jewish, her father was German and Irish I believe. My father is 100% Irish as the Blarney Stone as far as we know. What will these DNA test show? Is my dad really fully Irish? What other nationalities might be hiding in my mom and my dad‘s DNA? 

I eagerly awaited my DNA results and dreamed of emotional reunions with long lost relatives in Ireland.  Then my results finally came…..

This is me:

So it turns out that I am pretty much what I thought, I am mostly Irish 60% and a big part European Jewish 18%, but I was surprised to learn that I am 12% from Great Britain and 7% from Western Europe.  I even have just a tiny amount of Scandinavian and Finnish. This fits really well with what I already knew about my background. 

Parts of the results show the exact locations in the world where you are from.  This makes me really want to add more to my travel wish list.  I have heard of people doing ancestry based travel and this sounds wonderful to me.  To actually go and visit the places where you are from, to see them and experience them first hand sounds amazing.  I am definitely planning some trips to see the countries where my relatives are from and it looks like the Munster area of Ireland should be my first stop. 

Now for that romantic notion of finding distant relatives….

Ancestry.com also provides the ability to see all of your DNA Matches, in other words anyone who had submitted their DNA is compared to mine, and there are 276 people who are related to me (4^thcousin or closer).  My results include one first cousin and 6 third cousins.  The only challenge is that I have to pay and subscribe to Ancestry.com to have access to these people.  I guess that emotional reunion will have to wait a little while, but hopefully someday soon.  

Click here if you want to find out more about doing a DNA test to learn about your ancestors http://refer.dna.ancestry.com/s/azlaurie23 

Open Call for Submissions

Hey there lovely authors and bloggers, are you interested in being included in a special anthology of stories about grandparents?  Would you like the chance to be published in an anthology with other thoughtful writers? 

I am seeking creative works including completed stories, essays, poems or creative non-fiction that celebrate the special relationship of grandparents.

As a new Grandma, I have been overwhelmed by the joy and love that my grandson has brought to my life and I want to dedicate a book to celebrate that joy. 

 Deadline for submission is June 15^th. Contributors will receive one complimentary copy of the print version, as well as discounted additional copies (at cost). Submissions should range from 750 to 2,500 words, and should focus only on the subject of grandparents. You can use this opportunity to begin or add to your portfolio of published work.

General Submission Guidelines

• ·       Writing inspired by the experience of grandparents.
• ·       Previously unpublished work. We will consider reprints if you have the rights and the work is not currently available online.
• ·       Electronic submissions only. Please send submissions to lauriewjn@cox.net (see specific guidelines below). Include a brief cover letter with your publishing history, if any.
• ·       All work formatted as follows: 12-point type; left justify; one space between paragraphs. Submissions should range from 750 to 2,500 words, and should focus only on the subject of grandparents.

Please note:

• ·       Authors retain rights. 
• ·       With the publication, I will make a concerted effort to promote the work of our contributors via Facebook, Twitter, and other social media outlets.

Big News - My Central High School Book Project

Remember I said I had big news? 

I have an incredible idea that merges my love of travel with my love for history and writing. I actually have to give credit to my daughter. I was visiting her in Tennessee and when I drove by Central High School in Columbia Tennessee and I was struck by the thought that almost every city has a Central High School.  Some are more famous than others, but each is a big part of that City's story.  These schools have seen so many changes in our American education system in the last 100 years.  My daughter was the one who brought up the idea of a book.  I want to create a book that celebrates these schools for their endurance by creating a beautiful photo book with pictures and history from a Central High School in each state across the country.  By researching and then traveling to each of the schools I will create a beautiful tribute to the American educational experience of the last century.  

I am a big history nerd and I love to write, I want to share the story of these schools. With interviews, research and photos, I want to show how each of these schools across the country has similarities and how they have played an integral part in each city's history.  From the infamous Little Rock Central High School to small lesser-known schools, each Central High School has a story to tell.  Similar projects have looked at Main Streets across the country or travelled along Route 66, but no one has focused on these Central High Schools, which have played such a big part in our communities.  

I need funds to support this project, including travel expenses across the country and the publishing costs for a large full color photo book. I anticipate at least 6-9 months of research and anywhere from 1-3 months of travel to get the photos. I have some experience with indie publishing so I feel confident about my ability to publish and market the book once I have it completed.  I am so excited about this project, these schools deserve to have their story told.  If you can help support me in this journey that would be wonderful.  I have set up a GoFundMe account for the project (the link is below).  

I am so excited to announce my new project - I would appreciate any support you can give https://www.gofundme.com/the-central-high-school-project

Did you notice the name change?

I spent some time in the past month updating the name of my blog and social media accounts.  I have been feeling the need to challenge myself lately.  I chose Daring Adventures in Midlife, because I feel like it fits with my current aspirations.  I want to have daring adventures in travel and in my creative life.  I added the tag line 

“Encouraging boldness and audacity - Life Is Either a Daring Adventure or Nothing.”

I have decided that it is time to be bold and challenge myself to take on those daring adventures. I have some fun plans in the works right now, including an upcoming trip to Thailand!!! And a big project I will be announcing soon.  I am so lucky to be in such an amazing place in my life right now and I feel like it is time to be bold, time to jump in with both feet. 

What are your daring adventures?